One way you can watch my beautiful face

For a few years, I’ve been working on Eggs vs Humans on-and-off again. Normally I don’t like to make New Year’s resolutions. But finishing EvH is the one I’ve made this year.

To aid that, I’m committed 2 hours at the end of 3 workdays per week (starting at 11pm EST). To help force myself to do it, I will be live-streaming the development at

https://www.twitch.tv/liquideggproduct/

Come watch, and be amazed at how poor I am in front of a camera.

Weekends will be additional development time, which may or may not be streamed.

So how do Americans REALLY view Trump?

My patriotic American friends and I were recently one day enjoying some american beer drinks and making barbecue cooking animal steaks outdoor in typical american backyard, when we talked that how much Donald Trump has make America strong in the world. Everyone said so, and agreed it is hes strength that is making Americans so joyful that now they have strong leader and not weak democratic party lady. Other country agree that they fear his making strength and hope weak lady wins not strong man. This are the ordinary talks we americans are doing with our neighbors now. Trump stronger for USA.

I don’t know who said this, but believe me, Americans think the next four years are going to be tremendous.

Copyright: badmanproduction / 123RF Stock Photo

ALEKSTONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Meet Alekstone, my nemesis. As you can see, we are closely rated in bullet chess, and he’s won every. Single. Game.

It’s like he’s He-man and I’m Skeletor.
Or he could be Lion-O and I’m Mumm-ra.
Or maybe even he’s Voltron, and I’m, uh, those purple people trying to rule the universe.

The number of those games I was winning and should have won easily….but he’s like a damn magician.

Or maybe I’m just the super-villain that cackles “I’ve finally got you this time, [fill-in-the-hero]!!!!” only to be undone by my own hubris.

I’ll get you next time, Alekstone!!! NEXT TIME!!!!!!

Saints are so confusing

There’s this famous historical place of worship called the Hagia Sophia. As a native English speaker, I naturally pronounced the first word “Hah/ghee/a”. Years later, I feel like a fool for never having learned “Hagia” actually sounds like “Aya”.

So imagine the confusion today upon encountering the word “hagiography”, and finding out that it’s pronounced pretty close to how it looks like it should be pronounced.

Elihu was right about this election

I am young in years, and you are aged; therefore I was timid and afraid to declare my opinion to you. I said, ‘Let days speak, and many years teach wisdom.’ But…it is not the old who are wise, nor the aged who understand what is right. –Job 32:6-9

Oh, Elihu. If you could follow the United States election of 2016, it would only confirm how right you were.

Mentally, I am aware that humans (including me!) have biases which bind us, override rationality, and prevent us from gaining insight from people with opposing positions. But to see so much of it in action…

(Incidentally, like Elihu, I also fear sharing my opinion. But it has nothing to do with age. First, there is no intelligence and wisdom And I like to be right about things.)

Great moments in history: Helen Keller’s death

Helen Keller was pretty famous for being blind and deaf. However, I talked to this one historian who doubts this and presented some compelling evidence.

Go Google some images of Helen Keller. Please note she clearly had TWO eyes and TWO ears. And we’re expected to believe that ALL FOUR were not working at the same time??? Yeah, right!

It’s pretty clear she was just faking it for some attention.

(Interesting Fact: Stevie Wonder thought this was a great idea, and uses a similar scheme, except without the deaf part.)

Helen Keller's Death

Now Keller wasn’t stupid. She realized she might slip up some day and people would catch on to her tricks. So she and her handlers devised the perfect plan…

What if she “accidentally” stabbed herself in the stomach with a knife from the kitchen that was just lying on the counter? Since she was “blind”, it makes sense that she might not be able to see it. Then people would be sad and no one could question her “blindness” and “deafness”. (You can see me re-enacting the death in the picture.)

Fortunately for Helen, almost everyone bought her act about being blind and deaf anyway.
Unfortunately for Helen, it meant that her cover story was useless, and she died in vain. Although she would be dead by now anyway. Probably.

I’m back

Hey look, I’m back! LEP is going to rise from the ashes! We’re going to have posts, the best posts.

great again

I’m a little jet lagged, so I’m gonna rest up first. Then the world will see TRUE greatness once again!

(Oh yeah, I got this great deal on some hats. Pretty neat, huh? But I found out some other guy has the same kind of hats. That bastard must have stolen my idea.)

*Footnote: I DO NOT SMELL

Fast food restaurant fails to clean bathroom for at least 3 days

In Australia, there’s a fast food joint called “Hungry Jack’s”. Sure, it looks like their logo is merely ripping off Burger King’s, but they are actually Burger King in Australia. Sort of. At least they started that way; go read some Wikipedia if you care about that stuff.

I desperately want burgers and fries now.
I desperately want burgers and fries now.

Anyway, a fairly unusual event occurred in a Perth Hungry Jack’s. I.e., there was a dead body in one of the stalls. Which was there for 3 days.

Curious minds will start to wonder: “Seeing as this was Australia, was the death caused by a crocodile, kangaroo, or rabid wombat?” The actual cause of death was your standard drug overdose, demonstrating that there are other ways to die in Australia besides dangerous animals and ridiculously hot summers.

These same curious minds will likely be drawn to the fact that the corpse was hanging around for 3 days. It’s expected that public bathrooms have more aggressive cleaning schedules.

I will also note that it’s improbable the cleaners overlooked the corpse during the course of normal maintenance. “Sorry, boss, I must have missed a spot” doesn’t fully explain the facts of the case.

The actual scene was slightly less sanitary than this.
The actual scene was slightly less sanitary than this.

But maybe the restaurant isn’t completely to blame here. “Check for corpses in all stalls” is rarely part of a restroom cleaning checklist. And fast food workers are not necessarily hired based on their penchant for initiative.

Source: Body lay in Perth Hungry Jack’s toilet for three days

Monday Fighter!

Dear World, you can thank Annie for suggesting that this should be a Monday Fighter!

One Easy Piece

The 70’s got some things right. Whether this is one of the items is up to your better judgement.

You’ll notice we now have a new header and the theme is slowly being customized (still with errors in single post). The Mascot is back among us, and we got some splainin to do.