Creepily prescient

The Miami Dolphins have managed to accumulate 11 straight losses this season, the latest a 3-0 loss on Monday Night Football. Blue Devil Knight keeps insisting the Patriots and Dolphins are linked and will end up having parallel, but opposite fates. Right now, the Dolphins are 0-11 and the Patriots are 11-0.

Last week’s games only served to confirm his hypothesis: the Patriots won by 3 at home in a game between teams of disparate strengths. The Dolphins lost by 3 on the road in a game between teams of disparate strengths.

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Adam Schein of Fox Sports gave the Steelers an A- on his November report card despite losing to the 2-9 Jets and beating the Dolphins only by 3. He was impressed they beat up the Ravens, a team that’s lost 5 in a row. WHAT???

November 28th, 2007 10 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Sports

The Mascot and Chess

Mascot: You know, I thought chess was just some boring game played by a bunch of fat white guys. But I wanna learn it now!

Donnie: Really? That’s cool…I guess. So why the change of heart?

Mascot: I was wondering why I’d see some spouses at tournaments. But this comment revealed everything!

Donnie: Let’s see what you were–OH, MAN! You pervert! That doesn’t stand for–he was referring to the Smith-Morra Gambit!

Mascot: What, is that just some set of moves? You mean there’s no…

Donnie: NO!

Mascot: Well, that’s no fun! Never mind, then.

November 28th, 2007 8 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Chess, Uncomfortability