Monday Fighter!
I’m on the road on business this week, so do not have normal access to the wooden table. (If you argue I could have been foresighted enough to have some Monday Fighter!s ready beforehand…you’d be right.)
So, here’s a tidbit from engrish.com. This statement has probably been in some fortune cookie made at some point in the Earth’s history, so close enough.

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Also, congratulations to Ivan on his Lepers II victory! A proper and justified coronation will ensue later this week.

