Liquid Egg Product
The Shawn Bradley of Weblogs
"It's so thoughtless to live as poor as they do."
-- Hyacinth Bucket

Feel like Zeus

feel like zeus

I tried this stuff. I still don’t feel like Zeus. Or, if I do feel like him, being the king of gods is seriously overrated.

The tea isn’t bad, however.

March 7th, 2010 9 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Bad Ads, Snake Oil

Get ripped in 4 Weeks

get ripped in 4 weeks

October 27th, 2009 7 comments
Posted by The Mascot Filed under Patently Ineffective, Snake Oil

This Van Jones stuff

“You’ve never seen a Columbine done by a black child. Never. They always say, ‘We can’t believe it happened here. We can’t believe it’s these suburban white kids.’ It’s only them.”

A black man said this. What do you think? I think if you’re someone like Matt Drudge, who has an audience sensitive to racism against whites, you’d take the quote out of context and present it as part of a wider controversy about this person. (Never mind whether the statement is true.)

Here is what the black man, Van Jones, said back in 2005.

All of a sudden, it does not sound so bad.

I don’t know whether Mr. Jones can be vindicated of all silliness, so time to do some research. Wish me luck as I try to distinguish between truth and exaggeration from right-wing sources while figuring out the left-wing has to say about him.

September 5th, 2009 3 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under In the News, Snake Oil

Don’t do this

The closest thing I have to a phobia is to voluntary self-starvation. I can’t interact with an axorexic in any sort of normal fashion very long, and even TV programs or articles will throw me off-balance. It takes me several readings to finish stories dealing with voluntary self-starvation. Yet the subject’s like a moth to a flame for me, and invariably find it interesting. Like this story about a diet called LighterLife. You get 500 calories a day. That’s it.

The rapid weight loss is not arguable, but there’ve been stories of severe side effects, including vision problems, rotten teeth, and death. One lady’s death has been attributed to a weakened heart due to lack of protein.

Source: Dying to be thin: The diet craze sweeping Britain that allows you just 500 calories a day

November 13th, 2008 19 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under In the News, Snake Oil

Obama Be Thy Name

There are two reasons I’m voting for neither Obama nor McCain:

1. I forgot to request an absentee ballot on time. And since I’m not on welfare, ACORN won’t try to submit my request illegally.
2. I have no clue how the two frontrunners will really tackle this country’s problems. Their “solutions” cost money the government doesn’t have.

Here’s an article: Obama’s prime-time ad skips over budget realities

The article mentions that Obama’s programs would run the deficit to $1 trillion dollars. McCain’s not immune to similar criticism. As Congressmen, you’d think they understand they can’t keep their promises without consequence *cough*raisetaxesand/orcutotherspendingand/orprintmassivemoneyfurtherdevaluingthedollar*cough*. Well, I’m sure they do, but they can’t write winning ads or speeches based on that.

A million praises to l3rucewayne for this find. The name of the song is “Obama Be Thy Name”, and no, it’s not even mocking Obama. I like afro-pop and reggae, but man, those lyrics…

October 30th, 2008 6 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under In the News, Snake Oil

Perceiving Life

When I was 5, I never even thought about getting to 10.
When I was 10, 15 was inconceivably distant.
When I was 15, 20 represented a new era.
When I was 20, 25 was a modest journey.
When I was 25, 29 was right around the corner.
When I was 29, it didn’t matter. I’d get to 290 because I bought a pair of Alex Chiu’s immortality rings.

(Yes, I’m finally preparing to do that interview with him. And I really just bought a pair.)

July 23rd, 2008 5 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Snake Oil

Our experts, plus Wahrheit, give you our NFL picks

If you choose the right expert’s picks to bet on, you’ll win money this weekend! (Maybe.)


Donnie

The Mascot
Wahrheit
Seattle (+8)
vs
Green Bay
Green Bay Green Bay Green Bay
Jacksonville (+11.5)
vs
New England
Jacksonville New England New England
San Diego (+9)
vs
Indianapolis
San Diego Indianapolis Indianapolis
New York (+7.5)
vs
Dallas
New York Dallas New York
Record so far 2-2 1-3 4-0

January 10th, 2008 6 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Snake Oil, Sports

Listen to Wahrheit next time


Donnie

The Mascot
Washington (+4)
vs
Seattle
Seattle Washington
Jacksonville (-1)
vs
Pittsburgh
Jacksonville Pittsburgh
New York (+3)
vs
Tampa Bay
Tampa Bay Tampa Bay
Tennessee (+9)
vs
San Diego
Tennessee San Diego
Record 2-2 1-3

I am so glad I don’t bet on sports.

Speak for yourself.

Wahrheit went 4-0.

I still can’t believe you told people we could win them money last week. Now everyone can see you can’t make good judgments. You’re the kind of guy that would choose Velma over Daphne. We can’t trust someone like that.

Whuh? You mean from Scooby Doo?

Yar, if someone asked you which one you’d rather date, and for normal people (ie, not you) Velma’s just too, well, ugly.

Look, this blog is weird enough without getting into conversations about which cartoon characters are cuter.

I like that Esurance chick.

OK, fine! You’re a cartoon, it makes sense for you! It doesn’t for me!

*Sigh* I guess you’re going to want my picks for next week?

By tomorrow night, if you can.

As long as you don’t lord it over me if I go 0-4 next week.

Sure thing.

You really wouldn’t choose Velma, would you?

Er…yeah…probably I would.

Seriously? *Blanches* OK, that makes things easy…my picks for next week are the opposite of yours.

January 7th, 2008 6 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Babes & Alleged Babes, Snake Oil, Sports

Win money with Liquid Egg Product’s NFL playoff picks!

Mad Coinz

Tired of paying money to those handicappers who can’t win you money anyway? (”Call Jonathan Rock Sports now to get the Rock Hard Pick of the week. He feels you can move on this game like it’s already been played!”) Unlike those guys, the experts at Liquid Egg Product give away ALL their NFL playoff picks on their website FOR FREE!

The problem is we couldn’t agree on a lot of the picks. So, uh, just go with the guy you think knows more about football.


Donnie

The Mascot
Washington (+4)
vs
Seattle
Seattle Washington
Jacksonville (-1)
vs
Pittsburgh
Jacksonville Pittsburgh
New York (+3)
vs
Tampa Bay
Tampa Bay Tampa Bay
Tennessee (+9)
vs
San Diego
Tennessee San Diego
Super Bowl
Winner
Jacksonville New England

December 31st, 2007 8 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Snake Oil, Sports

It tasted better than it looked

Palak Paneer, for the most part

Today, I finally did significant food shopping, and randomly, I noticed prepackaged Indian meals by some company called Ashoka (that’s original). Just boil or microwave, and presto, it’s done. Being slightly wary of such products, I bought one of the Palak Paneer variety just to see if the meal would end up tasting non-awful. Well, two actually; it was buy one get one free.

Needless to say, how it looked on my plate was a modicum different than how it looked on the package. And I didn’t get any cute Indian chicks dropping by my place, either. Nonetheless, the quality was adequate enough to keep a couple in reserve for those nights I don’t want to do any real cooking.

November 8th, 2007 8 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Snake Oil