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North Korean hits, Vol. 1

Never mind the garbage that comes out of American radio. The North Koreans have cooked up some serious hit songs recently (iTunes doesn’t seem to have them yet for some reason). The only thing is that’s it’s tough deciding which one’s the best…

What’s the biggest North Korean hit song?

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April 17th, 2008 4 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Entertainment, North Korea

Revisiting the KCNA

As a brigandish and high-handed imperialist, I decided to revisit the KCNA in a brisk way.

The KCNA is the official North Korean news site. Yes, they really write like that. It hasn’t changed in the last six months. In fact, the stories seem to be exactly the same, except for the one about children kicking butt in Paduk (aka Go).

A couple thoughts to keep you inspired on a hump day:

“Kim Jong Il provided the historic June 15 joint declaration and the October 4 declaration, a programme for implementing the joint declaration in all fields, thus converting the north-south relations into those of reconciliation and cooperation and ushering in a new era of reunification in which the Koreans powerfully push forward the movement for national reunification in the idea of “By our nation itself” and with the will to embody it.”

“Great irony is that Japan, a political dwarf not entitled to talk about human rights, took the lead in railroading the anti-DPRK “resolution” through the recent session, behaving as if it were a ‘human rights judge.’”

April 9th, 2008 4 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under North Korea

Kim Jong-Il is pregnant

Kim Jong-Il is pregnant

Thanks to Allen for bringing this news of the Korean summit to my attention.

In this photo, the European Pressphoto Agency photographer captured irrefutable proof of the North Korean leader’s bulging belly. This likely is his last-ditch effort to bring forth a suitable heir.

Oh, and the flowers the North Korean people are holding in the background? They’re plastic.

October 2nd, 2007 8 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under North Korea

North Korea knows how to party

As much as Western and Arab media differ in their points of view, they both agree that North Korea has the oddest government in the world:

In 2002, for example, according to South Korea’s ministry of unification, celebrations for Kim Jong-il’s 60th birthday led to a 36 per cent drop in industrial productivity.

Granted, in the United States, we have an event which hurts productivity just as much. It’s called March Madness.

September 21st, 2007 2 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under North Korea

Devastation in North Korea

North Korea is going to have more problems, and I feel sorry for its people.

Torrential storms have battered the country, especially in the southeast, destroying infrastructure, washing away soil, and killing hundreds of people. For a country that already struggles with food, this is a brutal blow. Analysts say they will require extra food aid for one or two years.

The North Korean government requested international assistance, and in a rare move, broadcast video footage to the outside world of affected areas.

According to the KCNA, Pukchang County received 672mm of rain (26.5 in.) over the course of six days. Some areas had a peak rate of 90mm (3.5 in.) per hour, devastating buildings and farmland.

To their credit, the KCNA didn’t let the national disaster hamper their daily bashing of South Korea’s Grand National Party, the United States, and Japan.

KCNA for August 14.

August 14th, 2007 2 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under North Korea

World War III starts Saturday

It’s been rumored that Cheney has been unhappy with the president’s inability to “get things done”, and will try to initiate his agenda as quickly as possible.

Click to continue reading “World War III starts Saturday”

July 20th, 2007 3 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under In the News, North Korea

So who’s the lowest on photogenic scale?

Todd Schnitt Todd Schnitt Bald
Todd Schnitt: This was the guy in the billboards with a bald Britney Spears. As seen in the first picture, he’s not winning too many “Sexiest Man” awards. But the bald one is just too freaky, and it’s the reason he’s up here.


Manuel Uribe again
Manuel Uribe: That’s not the worst picture of him. And that’s saying something.


Madeline Albright and Kim Jong-Il
Kim Jong-Il and Madeleine Albright: The frumpy factor in this picture can only be exceeded with the addition of more frumpily-clothed people.


Sheila
Sheila: Oh, no. No, no, no. Oh, no. No. No!


So…who’s the least photogenic?

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July 2nd, 2007 1 comment
Posted by Donnie Filed under Burning Agony, Entertainment, North Korea, Uncomfortability

Cor. I’m impressed.

It looks like North Korea has slightly more firepower than we thought.

Click to continue reading “Cor. I’m impressed.”

June 13th, 2007 no comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under North Korea, Science/Technology

More heads of state claim they are pro-democracy

Nicely done, although Hugo and George may want a few words with you.

Click to continue reading “More heads of state claim they are pro-democracy”

June 4th, 2007 no comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under In the News, North Korea

Kim Jong Il is back!

Kim Jong Il looks cool in shades
(Click to zoom in!)

Thanks to a friend for re-invigorating my interest in the North Korean government with this article: Kim Jong Il captures Japanese artists’ imagination.

It would have been nice to buy a T-shirt or something from there. However, I could have lived quite contently without knowing someone had depicted Kim Jong Il in Japanese-style bondage.

In observing the North Korean media, I eventually burned out. My mistake was trying to check the KCNA’s website every flippin’ day trying to make sure that I didn’t miss anything. The fact is that the KCNA’s not a scarce resource; it’s a gushing geyser of information that’s impossible to exhaust in a reasonable amount of time.

Best headlines from today:

  • Profound Love and Total Dedication to Socialist Motherland Called for
  • Crafty Trick of Japan to Evade Responsibility for Past Crimes Debunked
  • Development of Indigenous National Cooking Culture [and they're doing this with what food?]

May 31st, 2007 no comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under North Korea