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The Shawn Bradley of Weblogs
"Let's break down the numbers: LaDanian has a paltry two touchdowns passing this year, as opposed to my seven."
-- "Drew Bledsoe"

Retraction

So. I have to take back what I said about the Mets being better than the Marlins. They’re equally mediocre. Although, the Mets have a four time larger payroll than the Fish, so someone’s not getting their bang for the buck.

July 1st, 2009 3 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Patently Ineffective, Sports

Education fail

All the cool kids hang out in the Scohol Zone. (It was eventually corrected.)

June 25th, 2009 6 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under In the News, Patently Ineffective

IQ Test Fail

Here’s a shot of an ad for one of those random “IQ Tests”. This question is reasonably compelling, so I took a few minutes to figure it out.

Clicking on the ad, I landed on a page where you could take this test, for I was hoping the rest of the exam would be fairly interesting. At the bottom was a list of four answers to choose from, although there was the minor issue of the correct answer not being listed. (Click to see the choices.)

June 11th, 2009 7 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Bad Ads, Patently Ineffective

Right, so there’s baseball going on

Last time we talked about baseball, the Marlins were 11-1, looking really good. And then over the next 32 games, they went 8-24, while the Mets cleaned up their game. We have a better sense of how good the teams are.

So it looks like The Mets are be..bet…b..b.

Let me try that again.

The Mets are bet-t-t. The Mets are bet..ter than the Marlins.

Fortunately, I can take comfort in the fact I’m not a Washington Natinals fan:

June 11th, 2009 no comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Sports, Weaksauce Losers

I’ve never been more proud to be white

So Caucasian…

June 3rd, 2009 3 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Entertainment, Patently Ineffective, Sports, Weaksauce Losers

A diamond in the rough

Maybe if Kevin Borseth were coaching the NBA instead of Michigan women’s basketball, he would have gotten the attention he deserved.

June 2nd, 2009 2 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Burning Agony, Sports

The unfunniest comic in Earth’s history

I’ve given up on reading newspaper comic strips a long time ago. Not because they’re “for kids”, but because they are hit-or-miss, with the emphasis on the miss.

But while waiting for some rice to finish cooking, I perused Yahoo! News for a bit and saw a link to the comics at the bottom. The rationale for clicking it? “Sure, why not, it’s been months since I’ve read the comics…”

A stark reminder of why comics have been website non grata. (Naturally, the goggles did nothing.)

Now if I were the guy writing the strip, I’d go to my editor and say, “Hey, look, I know you’re expecting another strip tomorrow, but it’s the least funny strip ever made. Literally. I prefer that my legacy not be ‘that guy who wrote the worst joke in the history of the planet’, so consider this my official letter of resignation.”

Certainly, there’s pressure on the comic strip writer because there has to be something everyday. But there’s just some point where you just have to give up. (Incidentally, I got an e-mail from someone who thought I could end up doing some type of production with LEP full-time. While very flattering, it would suck a lot of the fun out of it.)

May 24th, 2009 3 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Burning Agony

Dear random Lakers fan

keep talking rocket lovers we will see where your at after game 6

Seriously, what sort of taunt do you have lined up, “HAHA we beat a team with two All-Stars out for the season” ? (Well, except it would have worse grammar and spelling.)

May 11th, 2009 6 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Patently Ineffective, Sports

Baseball

If a Major League team finds itself 9 1/2 games out of first place on Apr 20, that usually means it’s not a good baseball team.

It looks the Washington Nationals are starting to figure out a good bullpen is not optional. (And the Marlins would like to thank the Nats for padding their win total.)

And yes, almost every non-Yankee fan enjoyed hearing about that 22-4 debacle.

This week I’m in Miami, and forgot the Monday Fighter! files at home. Monday Fighter! will be back next week.

April 20th, 2009 2 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Patently Ineffective, Sports, Weaksauce Losers

Get this woman a sponsorship

If LEP ever hires a spokesperson, this woman might be the one:

Quite possibly the most useless world record ever.

April 16th, 2009 4 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Burning Agony, In the News