Liquid Egg Product
The Shawn Bradley of Weblogs
"Kohler has been a relative non-factor other than scoring the goal."
-- Play-by-play of a football (soccer) match

On the economy

OK, so. In the United States we’re fighting about how to deal with the economy, including spending, health care, and all that kind of thing.

If you look at me, I’m considered pretty well educated, reasonably knowledgeable on current events and, unbelievably, a relatively smart guy (if I’m above average, how awful must average be?) But it’s obvious (to me) I don’t have the education or knowledge to have an opinion that’s worth anything. I doubt half of Congress has done sufficient research either, along with 80% of the people that are so sure they know which direction the country should go.

And among the people that know enough to have a decent opinion, they have different points of view because there are reasonable arguments to be made supporting their conflicting opinions.

Economics is not like engineering or (certain) mathematics. We can’t develop precise models and there will always be uncertainty.

I’ve just had it up to here with “liberals are fascist pinko commies” and “conservatives hate the poor and the black”.

August 11th, 2010 4 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Burning Agony, Patently Ineffective

Brian Cushing is still trying to convince us he’s innocent

Some months ago, Texans linebacker Brian Cushing was busted for testing positive for a banned drug and received a 4 game suspension.

He ended up saying he feared that he had a malignant tumor that was producing the banned substance. Now he’s trying to excuse the positive test on having trained too hard.

I’m still wondering how he was able to keep his Rookie of the Year award.

August 9th, 2010 5 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Patently Ineffective, Sports, Weaksauce Losers

America disappoints me again

Remember some of these types of statements people were making after 9/11?

“We aren’t going to change America because of some fanatic loonies.”

“Those terrorists can’t make us live in fear.”

Et cetera. Guess what? People are freaking out because a mosque is going to built near Ground Zero.

You’ve got to be kidding me.

While not scientific, 82% of the people in a MSNBC survey opposed the mosque. It’s likely many, if not most, of you readers agree with them.

I’d like you to explain why my dismay is unfounded.

August 4th, 2010 12 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under In the News, Patently Ineffective

The food industry is playing tricks with your mind

In the United States, we have to be so careful about the foods we shop for. Below is an aggregation of deceptive or tricky food labels I’ve encountered. If you have any to add, let me know in the comments. I’ll try to update this list from time to time.

Red Flags

Juice: The label should say 100% juice. If it doesn’t, you’re getting mostly sugar water. “Juice drink”, “juice beverage”, “made with real juice” and the like are guarantees there’s not much real fruit.

Even if it’s 100% juice, it’s still a little tricky. If you see something like “Cranberry Juice with another juice”, that other juice is apple juice, always. And apple juice will be the greatest percentage of the juice mix, because it’s inexpensive. Unfortunately, it’s not much healthier than sugar water. (Most other juices have greater health benefits.)

Made with [healthy ingredient]: It contains a pitiful amount of the healthy ingredient, just enough so it can legally put on the label. A specific example is bread (which is REALLY confusing); you don’t want “made with whole wheat”, you want “100% whole wheat”.

Reduced Fat: The sugar and/or salt have been increased. Similarly, reduced sugar or salt likely means an increase in something else bad. Compare the nutrition labels to the regular version of the product to see what changed.

No trans fats: Almost always an unhealthy food that’s high in fat, sugar and/or salt.

Electrolytes: Salt.

Deceptive ingredient labels: The ingredient label must be listed in order of descending composition (so the product contains the highest percentage of the first ingredient). A Smuckers strawberry jelly label had “strawberries” as the first ingredient. Sounds good, right? Problem is that the next 4 ingredients were simply different forms of sugar (corn syrup, high fructose corn syrup, sugar, and something else). In reality, there’s much more sugar than fruit, but the label is deceptive.

Made with sugar, not high fructose corn syrup: Somehow, the food industry has turned sugar into a health food. In terms of calories, sugar is equal to high fructose corn syrup. If you actually prefer sugar to HFCS, that’s fine, but the change won’t help you shed pounds. And the food itself is probably not that healthy.

Yellow Flags

Diet: Read the label to make sure you’re getting what you’re expecting. Sometimes it’s OK, but sometimes there are nasty surprises. A low calorie, but high sodium food is a common offender.

Organic: It does not mean “healthy”. Regular rules apply.

Natural: It also does not mean “healthy”. Regular rules apply.

July 13th, 2010 6 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Bad Ads, Patently Ineffective, Science/Technology, Weaksauce Losers

They made raps about Warcraft 2

Not that this should be surprising or anything. But…they made a rap about a video game. How are they supposed to get a girlfriend after that?

June 24th, 2010 7 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Gaming, Patently Ineffective

Baby Piss

A commenter on the Engrish.com blog points us to one of the greatest website names in the world:

babypiss

“BabyPiss”. Yes, this is the real name of the product. Wow.

June 2nd, 2010 3 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Entertainment, Patently Ineffective

Atlanta Hawks fail

It’s not that the Orlando Magic swept the Hawks. It’s that the average margin of victory was 25 points.

May 11th, 2010 no comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Patently Ineffective, Sports

10 bits of advice you should be wary of

So there’s this article going around called 10 life lessons you should unlearn. I’ve seen it passed around the last few days and held up as a great, helpful article. In reality, it has a mixture of good and bad points.

Sadly, one reason to be wary is that this article came from the Oprah magazine. There’s a decent chance that the advice sounds good, but has significant flaws if analyzed closely.

Point #7, that we should NOT think rationally about our decisions, really stuck out. Its rationale was that our “rational” brain is more error-prone than our “animal” brain. This is a foolish point of view that will cause more heartache than happiness in the long run for the following reasons:

1. The human ability to rationalize is our greatest strength over animals. It’s rational thinking that’s allowed our species to obtain its many achievements. Humans have created the Internet and walked on the moon. Our closest competitors can sometimes use sticks and rocks as tools. What the article’s author is asking us to do is to eliminate our greatest advantage.

2. The rational decider has a greater ability to recognize and correct for error. If a decision was made badly, he or she can figure what where the analysis went wrong and improve the decision process for the future. The “animal brain” counterpart does not have this resource.

3. The instinctive decision maker will feel like they are doing better than they actually are. This is for two reasons:

a. Sometimes things will turn out well, sometimes not. Unfortunately, human nature means most of us will put more weight on the times decisions do go well.

b. The instinctive decider has put less effort into considering the pros and cons of all decisions and consequences. This means a lower ability to determine whether a decision was optimal or not (perhaps if only the difference between “good” and “great”, or “bad” and “catastrophic”.)

4. The rational decider can more easily determine when there’s not enough information to make a good decision. Since the instinctive decider doesn’t lean on information as much, a decision might be made with an insufficient view of the situation.

5. It should be noted humans CAN develop instinct. But in order for human instinct to work well, it requires expertise and practice. Experts in a given field can make good decisions with less analysis because they’ve seen more situations and the consequences of decisions. (The chess readers of LEP can relate — you’ve probably noticed you naturally consider stronger moves with more practice and knowledge.)

Making an instinctive decision in a field you have no expertise in is essentially rolling the dice. Why let fate determine the outcome when you can affect how things turn out?


What point #7 should have been: Humans are strongest when they rely on each other. Following your instinct is reasonable if you are an expert in the field. But if you aren’t, and your rational analysis is insufficient to make a good decision, a better course of action is to find someone who is an expert and follow their instinct.

There are nine other pieces of advice in the article, which will not be analyzed here. The only thing I ask is that you actually think about what they say and determine whether they make sense, have important limitations, or are nonsensical.

May 7th, 2010 5 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Patently Ineffective

“Obama is considering banning fishing in America.”

As far as I can tell, a lot of the Tea Party rage is because Obama has a “D” after his name. Either that, or he’s a godless Muslim.

Favorite quote: “If we kick them all out, who’s going to pick the fruit???” (around 8:10, slightly deranged-sounding guy talking about illegals)

Link: Tea Partiers In Tax Day Protests Try To Explain Why They’re Against Obama

April 22nd, 2010 no comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under Entertainment, In the News, Patently Ineffective

Breast milk happens to be a useful tool

If you’re like most people, you’ve probably thought to yourself, “Hey, I wonder when Liquid Egg Product is going to get us some good breast milk stories.” Well, today’s your lucky day…

Breast milk can be used as a cheese: The couple has further plans to create a gelato.

Breast milk can repel the opposite gender: And considering the number of caddish males, this could prove rather useful.

Breast milk can be used as a weapon: This is probably how Saddam Hussein was planning to use biological weapons

Breast milk can earn you a pink slip: We give cow’s milk to babies. Is a baby accidentally getting another mother’s milk really that frightening?

March 9th, 2010 6 comments
Posted by Donnie Filed under In the News, Patently Ineffective, Uncomfortability