Discovering Uribe’s capabilities
First, if you are eating or have recently eaten, and have a vivid imagination, it may be best for you to discontinue reading this post. And you are free to kill Allen afterwards, who alerted me to the story.
Our friend Manuel Uribe, who once weighed 1200 lbs or so, is now down to 700. With no sarcasm intended, good for him.
But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t still look like this:
It’s already established that he has a girlfriend. And he wants to marry her when he’s actually capable of walking her down the aisle. But what wasn’t clear earlier was how well or poorly they do with all that physical stuff. Now we know:
“We are a couple,” Uribe said. “We have sex, and in the eyes of God we are already married.”
I’ve spent no time figuring out how those mechanics could possibly work. You may want to follow my lead.
This is actually a little inspiring.
Comment by l3rucewayne | 17 June 2008
How sad is this? If Manuel Uribe were getting more than me, I’d be bitter too, but I’m mature enough not to post a picture of Jabba the Hutt just to make fun of him.
Comment by The Mascot | 17 June 2008
@l3rucewayne: In a strange way, yes. I really hope he can manage his goal before dying.
@The Mascot: Look it, I’m not the one making Jabba the Hutt jokes.
This is one of those posts where I’d like a mulligan. It came across more mean-spirited than intended. I should have just let you handle this in the first place.
Comment by Donnie | 17 June 2008
i was actually trying to think of something to say without being really derogatory, but i failed miserably.
I’ll just commend the guy on trying to lose weight.
And now I need to drink myself into a stupor to wash away this image. tsk tsk mascot. you should really put up a warning or something before posting stuff like this.
Comment by annie | 17 June 2008
How’s his chess game?
Comment by Tom Panelas | 18 June 2008
@Annie: This time was not the egg’s fault. Next time I see you on IM, I want to see some of those derogatory comments.
@Tom: LOL. I’ll try to set up an interview using my emergency Spanish skills.
Comment by Donnie | 18 June 2008