Getting the girl
Dear Mascot,
I feel bad for you, being such an inept flirt (I won’t embarrass you by sharing your experience from last night). I’m going to teach you how to get a girl’s number. First, let’s take a look at your methods:
1. Going heavy on the Don Juan wanna-be moves.
2. Posting nude pics of yourself.
3. Trying to win so-called “masculinity contests” against females.
First, you don’t have the body to impress anyone (heck, I don’t have the body to impress anyone and it’s better than yours). Second, if you have a hard time proving you’re more masculine than females, you’ve pretty much lost the battle already.
Let’s compare that with what I did on a flight a couple weeks back:
1. Offered use of headset to hear the in-flight entertainment (we ended up using one earpiece each—tres romantique, although that was not the intention).
2. Showed an interest in her life and hobbies.
3. Respectfully (and nervously) asked about potential future meetings.
Strangely, I asked for her number despite being unsure of pursuing it. Maybe it was just to prove to myself that I’ll have the stones to do it again in the future.
[The Mascot responds: I hate you, and I think you're a liar.]
Mascot - don’t hate, congratulate.
Donnie - *sigh*.
Comment by annie | 16 October 2007
Before I can pass judgement, did she:
1) provide the phone number?
2) provide a REAL phone number?
3) provide a REAL phone number that doesn’t go to some radio station’s voicemail?
Comment by Allen | 16 October 2007
@Annie: *Sigh*? I’m just proud not to have used my usual technique for picking up hot chicks:
1. Mentally curl up in the fetal position and don’t talk to them.
@Allen: Google could not find the phone number, which is probably good (it’s not some local company number). But I’m really have to call to prove it’s not fake now, don’t I?
Comment by Donnie | 16 October 2007
LOL great point allen. i think she gave a fake number just to get rid of him.
Comment by Liquid E. P. Mascot | 16 October 2007
hahaha no pressure don-don, but I think you should call. however, I do applaud you for not doing the mental fetal curl thing. that’s big stones man. Big stones.
Comment by annie | 16 October 2007
Good news: the phone number’s really hers.
Bad news: apparently, it was turned off b/c it went straight to answering machine.
The suspense continues…
Comment by Donnie | 17 October 2007
Was it the generic cell phone voicemail of:
This is the voicemail box for 7-8-6….
Or was it an actual voice?
Either way, perhaps they were midflight
Comment by Allen | 17 October 2007
WoooooooooHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Stones, baby.
Comment by annie | 17 October 2007