Under the Knife
Tonight I went to a restaurant called the Knife. It’s an Argentinian-style steakhouse (it’s a meat buffet). Oh, man, they have a lot of beef. And free wine; I’m not drunk, but definitely tipsy, so I may live to regret this post in some way.
Unfortunately, wine comes with the meal (which is $28 on weekend nights). The bad part is that I don’t drink much, and I accidentally had too much. Since win isn’t a “hard liquor”, I tend to treat it like drinking water. You don’t know how many times I re-typed some of these words to get them right.
Anyway, it’s a meat buffet, and it’s massive. Insert standard joke about the arteries hardening just looking at the food. The table near us had these two girls, with diving, diving, DIVING necklines; I don’t know if neckline is the right word it was so far down. One of them saw me looking but somehow I think they did not mind the attention.
One of the things my ex told me is that there is a sliding scale of how women react if a guy is staring. Like if it’s Brad Pitt, they are flattered, but if it’s obese 60-year-old guy it’s not so welcome. Being still 29 and not ugly, I can get away with more than say old fat guy but it’s also good not to make the girls uncomfortable. At least I think it is polite to keep eyes reasonably in control. Rule of thumb as I have heard is “glance OK/flattering, stare creepy”. What do you girls think?
Anyway, the beef was really good and for dessert was flan which was good. The coffee was average; they probably used Maxwell House or something.
dont worry, if they like it, they will let you know
Comment by David K, Seattle | 18 May 2008
Personally, i think you’re a pervert.
Comment by The Chess Player | 18 May 2008
staring is creepy unless you actually come over to talk to me, then it’s ok.
Next time leave the misspellings, then you can go back later and gauge your fine motor skills under the influence. And you would entertain me, which I know is your entire reason for being.
Comment by annie | 18 May 2008
When you reach middle age… where I am … Hair-loss is fully underway and the metabolism downshifted to the point where it seems like its in reverse. Since I’m neither studly young nor OBF ( old bald and fat) I’m invisible to the young ladies. So I stare and then when the cloaking device is removed ( usually signaled by her girl friend saying somehting like ” Hey. I think that homeless man is staring at you!” ),I make like I’m adjusting to the new bifocals.
Comment by Blunderprone | 18 May 2008
nothing like an all you can eat beef feast with free wine. chicks wearing gownless evening straps also help make it an excellent night. i don’t stare, i ogle. sometimes through a window. i call it “flirting,” the cops call it “stalking.” i’m pathetic at chicks as well as chess. and don’t listen to blunderprone, we went out maybe three times during the tournament, and each time, some chick came up and started flirting with him…
Comment by chessloser | 18 May 2008
Don’t let ‘em kid, Blunderprone and chessloser are both known in the chess world as the consummate ladies men…there are like 10 others–out of 30,000 adult members…
Comment by Wahrheit | 19 May 2008
Don’t let Wahrheit get away with modesty. He’s one of the “10 others” as well. I saw his magnetism in action in Alaska.
Comment by The Mascot | 19 May 2008
Eye contact is better than eye-to-cleavage contact. But as long you didn’t, like, follow them to their car or begin issuing cartoonish wolf-whistles at the sight of them, you probably didn’t ruin their evening.
Comment by Kate Dino | 19 May 2008
Wow. The only thing here is to say how much I appreciate you guys taking the time to comment. This stuff makes my day.
Comment by Donnie | 19 May 2008
gownless….evening straps. gownless…evening.. ooh.
That’s a quote of the day. Maybe the week.
Comment by annie | 20 May 2008
What’s wrong with Maxwell House? I like Maxwell House.
Comment by Carson | 26 May 2008