Yummy
Some people take offense at killing dolphins for food. Yet when it comes to catfish, shrimp, chicken, or pigs, a lot of these same people won’t bat an eye. (Note that PETA gets full marks for being consistent.)
Look it, we either get to kill animals for food, or we don’t. But agonizing over “cute” animals while being guilt-free about eating others? I have no use for it.
You forgot to mention the millions of eggs that are cracked, beaten, scrambled, or fried every year! Oh, the inhumanity! When will it ever stop?
Comment by Liquid E. P. Mascot | 13 November 2007
Thus paving the way for soylent green? Yum. Protein.
Comment by Kate Dino | 13 November 2007
exactly. Plus cockroaches are much better on a salad than croutons. Yum. Protein. heh heh
As I type this Molly looks at me with unconditional love. But I’d club her for her fur if we ever have a nuclear winter.
Comment by annie | 13 November 2007
I usually find it easier to eat dolphin when they’ve mixed it with the tuna in the can. That way you never know when you’re eating cute little Flipper, and even if you happen to get a chunk of him, it wasn’t your fault.
Comment by Samuraipawn | 14 November 2007
That should be “accidentally” mixed dolphin with tuna…
Comment by Samuraipawn | 14 November 2007
Btw, today is the day of stating the obvious!
Comment by Samuraipawn | 14 November 2007
Cute, individual servings:
http://www.petebevin.com/kittens/
Comment by Tacticus Maximus | 14 November 2007
I wonder if little Miss Hollywood is aware that among the beautiful, intelligent and oh-so-gentle dolphinus, the males will slam into the cute little babies at 40 mph, over and over, until they’re squishy little carcasses, then rape mom?
Oops, I guess I’m anthropomorphizing, too.
I like my dolphin steak medium rare with a side of whale, BTW.
Comment by Wahrheit | 14 November 2007
@Mascot: Somehow, I don’t think you’re getting much momentum with that.
@Kate: “SOYLENT GREEN IS PEOPLE!!!!!” (The movie was far worse than the book.)
@Annie: I’ll bet you couldn’t do it. I’ll bet I couldn’t do it. Besides, that’s way too little fur to help anyway.
If it came to food however, I could definitely do it.
@Samuraipawn: LOL. Need to start eating more tuna.
@Tacticus: Not enough meat on ‘em.
@Wahrheit: No kidding? That’s fun stuff to know! Now I’m wondering why would the dolphin males kill their young like that. The rape part seems to be not uncommon in the world.
I’d love to try whale, but I’ve heard the meat really isn’t all that wonderful.
Comment by Donnie | 14 November 2007
P.E.T.A ? Doesn’t that stand for People Eating Tastey Animals?
Comment by Blunderprone | 14 November 2007
I loath to respond to a funny post with an actual serious comment, but…
I think there are nonarbitrary ways to parse the animal kingdom. Intverbebrates such as shrimp, lobsters, clams, octopus, for instance, don’t have cerebral cortex and other neural structures which many people believe support awarenss, conscious pain etc.. I frankly have no idea if a shrimp feels pain. But if I thought they didn’t, and I was a vegetarian, I’d consider becoming a vege-invertebratarian.
Plus, chickens are funny lookin’, so they are OK to eat.
Manatees are stupid and slow, obviously God created them to be captured and eaten by carnivores and omnivores.
Dogs are too trusting, so should be eaten.
Bonobo chimps are competing with us in certain cognitive tasks, so we should eat them so they don’t overtake us in evolution.
Human infants are helpless little things, with tasty livers that haven’t been ruined by decades of alcohol abuse. Clearly if we weren’t supposed to eat them they would be able to run away from us.
Endangered animals are tasty partlyl because of the thrill of breaking the law during consumption. I had an American Eagle omelette a few years ago that was delicious. Now that they are off the endangered species list the allure is gone.
I have also made a Jurassic Park burger, bringing species back into existence just so I could eat them. Very tasty. The longer it takes to prepare a dish the better they taste.
Comment by Blue Devil Knight | 14 November 2007
Donnie, the dolphin baby-killing is of other-guy dolphin’s offspring, then they impregnate mom with their own Selfish Genes…Grizzly bears do it also, if I remember right. BDK–yeah, second that. Where do you get your bonobo, though? My supplier got busted in that elephant ivory sting.
Comment by Wahrheit | 14 November 2007
This is the most ridiculous and repugnant thread I’ve ever seen. (Oh, except the one with the mascot scat on the beach.) Dolphins exist to protect surfers from sharks. Do you not read the news?
Anybody see The Freshman? That was funny.
Comment by Derek Slater | 15 November 2007
THAT WAS NOT MY SCAT! It was a very unstrategically placed rock that looked like…you know…scat.
I almost quit because of that, ya know. Then you would have been sorry.
Comment by Liquid E. P. Mascot | 15 November 2007